KITTENS!

Welcome to the 9th Alternative Miss Ireland!

This NINTH re-incarnation in the annual life of Ireland's most notorious and feline-groovy alternative beauty pageant returns to its theatrical home on Sunday March 16 2003. Once again, the Olympia Theatre generously plays hostess to this purring pandora's Box of performance. Open to beasts and beauties of every kind, the Alternative Miss Ireland pageant has blossomed into one of the key social and fundraising events in the diaries of any self-respecting aspiring Queen-Cailin. It is regularly toasted as being "The most hugest significant post-culturally-kinky event of the year!"

Now boosted by regional championships in Limerick and Cork, the Alternative Miss Ireland draws contestants and supporters from all over the country including Northern Ireland and has recently dragged a few cats from further afield in through its welcoming flap.

This year, The Alternative Miss Ireland promises so much MORE!

More funds raised for our chosen HIV/AIDS related charities [Cairde and Open Heart House]

More outrageous and ingenious performances from all the little Misses

More glamorousness and than is healthy at any one sitting from Panti

And our cast of thousands (well, at least a full litter)

Who will be crowned Queen-Kitty from this year's litter? The Alternative Miss Ireland crown (designed by Pauric Sweeney) currently nestles on the head of Miss Sid Viscous. But not for long! As the pageant spirals through Day-wear, Swim-wear and then Evening-wear, the pressure will mount on our gaggle of hand-picked celebrity judges to choose who gets the cream, and who gets the litter tray!

Alternative Miss Ireland IX will introduce a whole new generation to The larger than life delights of Panti, the wildest puss-in-boots of them all whilst giving the old tigers a hefty tug of the whiskers, just in case they had forgotten what it's all about a celebration through love, creativity and abject queerness for friends and strangers alike, uniting to champion and support organisations working for and living with HIV/AIDS related communities and individuals.

So get your heels on and drag you and your caboodle in from the outdoors and down to the Olympia Theatre Dublin on Sunday March 16.

You can find out plenty more, read soundbites, find out kitty-tips and look through the huge image-library from pageants at www.alternativemissireland.com.