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Problem 1 : March 2001
Hi
Claire
My
name is Tim I am 42 years of age and I am gay I have had a pretty bad time so
far because I am gay it is not that I dont accept it i do and i fully understand
it over the years I have done everything possible to be happy which included
going on holidays on my own to gay places even going away for 4 months to
america.
All
this was ok but a bit lonely I want to stay in ireland i have even had to go to
the doctor for help you see it is in my mind all the time i have had to take
medication for sleeping i am a nice guy and also attractive which also brings
problems with girls asking me out and people making gestures that i might be gay
that part dont bother me anymore i just laugh it off
I
have a great family and loads of good friends which none know i am gay and i
never will tell them because they would be no help and in spite of what people
say they would never fully understand maybe i would have stayed in america which
i loved but for my parents who are elderely and they think so much of me i know
there hearts were broken when i went even though they did not say so people say
i have my own life to lead which is true but in my own heart i cant do it
Recently
through the gay chat rooms i have met a couple of guys in strange places for
quick relief in cars etc these guys were very nice but it makes me feel dirty i
even gave anal sex to a guy for the first time i used a condom and it worked ok
no leakage or anything i have never had any fluids into my body but i am still
worried over the anal sex even though i know i used precaution
I
worry all the time and i dont know how i have survived so long without a
breakdown i am better now about things i have learned a lot from the net and
have spoken to a lot of people who are lonely like me i think my problem at the
moment is my age i am panicking at 42 its getting old even though i dont look or
act my age to everyone i am the great guy who likes to party to tell you the
truth i dont know what to do i know my options like moving to somewhere else but
as i said earlier i dont want that do you think there is anything wrong in
meeting guys off the net i am very cautious all these guys are meeting all the
time what choice do we have when we are not out and as many guys agree the gay
scene is a bit grotty and weird i honestly dont know how you can help me but i
know i need advice
thank
you
Tim
Click here to read
Claire's Reply to Tim
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